Jesus Isn't Decaf (By Naomi Meyers)

She should have kept her mouth shut. Desperately wished she had. No matter how strong her distaste. No matter her feelings of being replaced. No matter how much better she believed her brother could have done than this foreign floozy. She should have kept it all to herself. The ugly words about his wife. The questioning words concerning his leadership. The arrogant words suggest she and Aaron could talk to and hear from God just as well as Moses. From somewhere deep in her soul, released by her annoyance with her new sister-in-law, a well of angry, jealous, pretentious words spilled from her lips, illuminating the true content of Miriam’s heart. 

It was not her finest moment. She knew it. Aaron knew it. God knew it. Unfortunately, Moses was about to know it. They had all been summoned. All three were to appear in front of the Tabernacle to meet with God. It would no doubt be a harrowing experience, the wicked thoughts and desires of her heart paraded for all to see. There would be punishment. She knew it. Over and again God had reiterated that, although His love was endless, He wouldn’t leave sin unpunished. And she had most definitely sinned. Egregiously. (Exodus 20:5-6; 34:6-7)

Dragging the toes of her sandals in the dirt, Miriam slowly made her way to the designated meeting place. She didn’t want to go. Didn’t care to attend. Didn’t dare miss the appointment. It wasn’t optional. Her heart beat a rapid tattoo in her chest. Dread and anxiety melded together, forming a tight knot in the pit of her stomach. She didn’t care to meet Aaron’s gaze. His face would surely be filled with accusation. She couldn’t make herself glance in Moses’ direction. His loving smile would soon be replaced by a wounded frown as he was blindsided by her attempted insurrection. She really didn’t want to face God. Didn’t want to hear His disappointment. Didn’t want to feel His wrath. Didn’t want to know His just punishment. Deserving though she knew she was, Miriam wished the confrontation and ensuing fallout could be avoided. It couldn’t, so she reluctantly took her place beside her brothers.   

Called to come forward, Miriam and Aaron stood trembling before the obvious wrath of God. Regret etched their ashen faces. Guilty heads hung low. Words failed them as they stood before God to give account of their previous conversation. No excuse could be made. None was available. Their words had been unkind and unwarranted. Untrue. They knew the relationship Moses had with God. Knew their own relationships with God were nowhere near the same. Moses’ relationship was personal. Nearly palpable. His information and directions weren’t carefully gleaned from visions and dreams. No. Moses took instruction directly from the lips of God, an event neither of them had experienced. Ever. They had never heard God’s actual voice themselves. Had solely relied on Moses for guidance and direction. Yet, when frustration and irritation boiled over, they presumed, through the darkness of their own hearts, that they could lift the mantle of leadership from Moses and set it on their own shoulders. Except they couldn’t. Because God wasn’t having it. 

He said it in no uncertain terms. God was angry. At them. At their words. At their motives. And He had the right to be angry. Not just because they had been busily brewing a method to abscond with Moses’ leadership. God had the right to be angry that the people He had chosen to aid Moses in the monumental task of leading the Israelite nation to the promised land were so inwardly focused. He had the right to be angry because their hearts were so full of arrogance and selfishness that they would deign to promote themselves above God’s chosen leader. God had the right to be angry that, at a time when they should have come alongside Moses, shown their support, and portrayed true holiness, they were busy gossiping and backbiting and stirring up trouble. God had the right to be angry and disappointed and heartbroken that Miriam and Aaron were more concerned about their angst with Moses and discontent with their leadership rank than they were about their own obvious lack of relationship with God Himself.

For reasons to which we are not made privy, Miriam bore the brunt of the punishment. Perhaps she initiated the entire situation, started the conversation, exacerbated the issues. Maybe Aaron simply nodded his head in agreement as his older sister spat her venom and hate. It doesn’t really matter now. As the Spirit of God withdrew from them, Miriam looked down at herself to find she’d been stricken with defiled skin. Not just a little skin infection that would heal shortly with proper care. This was far worse. A sickness from which there was no recovery outside the miraculous. Every inch of Miriam’s visible skin was covered in leprosy.  

Never had isolation seemed like a blessing, yet, from her ragged hut outside the Israelite encampment, Miriam stared at her leprous skin and counted it such. She had gotten off lightly. Not because she deserved it. Not because Aaron had begged. Not because her contrition had been immediately forthcoming. No. Miriam would spend only seven days in excommunication from her friends and family simply because Moses asked. Pleaded, really. Begged God to spare her life. Offered an alternative punishment to the death that would certainly follow this particular form of illness. She didn’t deserve the mercy. She wasn’t worthy of the grace. Yet God chose to answer. Chose to spare her. At the earnest pleading of the brother she had unabashedly derided, God stepped in. Her death sentence was replaced with a seven-day excommunication. Seven days of lonely contemplation. One hundred sixty-eight hours of self-examination. Ten thousand minutes for Miriam to change her focus, lift her eyes, and set her heart and soul to follow God alone. And she did. 

Seven days after being handed a death sentence, Miriam emerged from isolation a new woman. Physically and spiritually. Her time alone had changed more than the state of her skin. It changed the state of her heart. What before had been cluttered with murmurs and complaints, envy and jealousy, selfishness and arrogance was now filled with the peace and contentment of God. Happy to resume her role as a prophet, musician, and leader of the women. Blessed to stand in support behind Moses. Her heart no longer yearned for power and prominence. Her mouth would no longer run to express her opinions. Her body wouldn’t suffer the consequences of her sin. Neither would her soul. Miriam learned in seven days what often takes humanity a lifetime to grasp. You are what you speak. (Exodus 15:20-21; Numbers 12:1-16; Deuteronomy 24:8-9)

It isn’t a big, well-kept secret. It is common sense. Your words matter. The ones you speak in private. The ones you yell in public. The ones you know you shouldn’t say. The ones you leave unsaid. The Bible is full of words about our words. Admonitions to guard our mouths, watch our tongues, think more, speak less. Even Jesus addressed the subject. Of all the topics we needed Him to cover in His three short years of earthly ministry, the words we speak made His shortlist. Because words are powerful. What you say doesn’t simply dissipate with the half-hearted apology you offer. The insult you hurled isn’t forgotten because you followed it up with a quick, “Just kidding.” The backstabbing, judgmental gossip in which you engage is not harmless because the words were spoken in secret. God hears. God sees. God knows. The heart you hurt. The reputation you smear. The damage you cause. Life and death are in the power of your words. Not physically. Spiritually. Your life. Your death. Your choice. (Proverbs 10:19; 13:3; 17:9; 18:21; 21:23;  Matthew 12:36-37; 15:18; Luke 6:43-45)

So watch your words. Let them be few. Choose them carefully. Speak life. Into your own soul. Out of your own soul. Refuse to engage in idle gossip, malicious slander, or destructive meddling. Don’t air your grievances to every ready ear. Keep your opinion to yourself. Shut your mouth. Unless you have something kind to say. Unless your words have been vetted by the Holy Spirit. Unless you are busy encouraging, uplifting, and supporting one another to follow hard after God. Hold your tongue. Inspect your words. Examine your heart. The state of the second determines the quality of the first. Although they may be an inaccurate description of the one you choose to slander, your words will be an accurate description of your heart. Choose them wisely. Your tongue will tell the tale. You are what you speak. (Ecclesiastes 5:2-3; Ephesians 4:29; Exodus 23:1; James 1:26; 4:11; Psalm 141:3; I Thessalonians 5:11; Psalm 19:14; 139:23-24)

Bloodthirsty excitement pumped through their veins as they saw the plan coming together. Finally. It seemed they’d been working toward this one goal far longer than they anticipated. Not by choice or for lack of trying. No. They had certainly tried before. Multiple times. Hours had been spent in clandestine meetings plotting and strategizing. Every time it had come to nothing. Their carefully laid plans had been thwarted. He’d miraculously walked away. Escaped their clutches. Or the crowd had forced them to stand idly by. It wouldn’t happen this time. The deck was stacked in their favor today. Judas’ purse was heavy with his commission, his feet light as he led them to the garden where they would finally begin the final, fatal steps of their evil plot. (Matthew 21:46; Luke 4:30; John 7:30,44; 10:39)

Adrenaline had them surging through the calmness of the night, trampling tender grasses, snapping delicate branches, destroying fragile blooms, interrupting the peace exuded by the space. Not one of them cared. Single-mindedly focused, they recklessly continued. Their torches cast an ominous glow. Their swaying lanterns twisted the shadows. Their swords clanked as they marched in full battle array. This was not simply another day, another order, another assignment. This was the most important day, the most notorious order, the most sought-after assignment. The success of this mission could make or break their careers. And its completion stood mere feet away. (John 18:1-3)

Disappointment replaced some of the bloodlust and dampened their adrenaline rush as they realized there would be no fight. No argument. No escape attempt. They had hoped He’d resist. Give them a reason to do some damage right there in front of His followers. A swift punch to the head. A hard boot to the abdomen. A sharp sword through the heart. Those soldiers lived for the moments their evil, cruel, hateful hearts could inflict pain, punishment, and death. It was all a game to them. A brutal game. One they played well. One they would gleefully continue to play once the cowardly Pilate, at the riotous urging of the depraved crowd, handed Jesus over to be flogged and crucified.  (John 18:4-8)

It was an insulting game of “King for a day,” fun only to the perpetrators of the heinous acts. A game of humiliation and abuse, ending in the ultimate barbarity of Roman crucifixion. An entire company of soldiers assembled to take part in the event. Stripping Jesus of His own clothing, they dressed Him in a purple robe, the color signifying royalty. On His head they placed a crown woven from dried thorn branches, pressing down to drive the painful thorns into the tender flesh of His head. As the blood flowed down the sides of His face, falling to stain the borrowed purple garment, they pressed a staff into his right hand. Sneering and jeering, they took turns dropping to their knees at His feet and mockingly crying out, “Hail to the King of the Jews!” (John 19:2-3; Matthew 27:27-31; Mark 15:15-20)

Not one of them meant those words. Didn’t even realize they were true. Had no idea they were actually kneeling in the very presence of Heavenly royalty. Nor did they care. It was all a game to them. A way to feed their bloodlust. They believed themselves to be in charge, the ones leading Jesus to the cross. Not once did they realize He was leading them there. Bringing them to a place where all their abominable acts could be forgiven, their odious souls cleansed, their disgraceful lives redeemed through the grace and mercy flowing down in the bloody sacrifice of the cross. 

They would find themselves there. At the foot of Jesus’ cross. Their unchanged hearts would miss the opportunity to repent, choosing instead to continue their villainous game. Others would happily join them. Sneering. Mocking. Insulting. Eventually, the soldiers would offer up a sponge of vinegar with a side of heavy derision. At His refusal, they would carelessly shrug their shoulders, sitting back to watch the goings on, joyfully listening as one of the criminals hanging beside Him took up their torch of haranguing and harassment. They heard the words of the second criminal earnestly begging for forgiveness and seeking eternal life. They heard the merciful response of grace and forgiveness Jesus uttered in return. Yet still they chose to continue in their remorseless path. Standing at the foot of the cross, the soldiers knew what to do, but arrogantly opted not to do it. (Luke 23:26-43)

 Soldiers weren’t the only ones who followed Jesus’ death procession. Others were there as well. Those who had already experienced His power and forgiveness. Those like Mary Magdalene. Her story of deliverance was so great she’d have followed Jesus anywhere, even if it meant climbing on the cross herself. For years she’d sought deliverance from the seven demons plaguing her. She’d nearly given up hope. Holding on seemed silly. Deliverance seemed impossible. She’d asked every newcomer that entered her village, no one knew anyone or anything that could salvage her terrorized soul. Then she met Jesus. The sound of His voice and the power of His words sent the evil spirits running. She was free. Free to follow Jesus wherever He led. He’d led her to His cross. (Luke 8:1-2; 23:49; Mark 15:40; 16:9; Matthew 15:40; 27:55-56; John 19:25-27)

Others had found their way there as well. Some by appointment. Others in curiosity. Some in hateful rejoicing. Others in undying love. The ground was littered with onlookers of every rank and social status. Religious aristocrats. Pharisaical rulers. Mockers. Scoffers. Scorners. Those who wished they believed. Those who already did. Those who chose to follow Jesus even to the point of His death. Those who watched when they didn’t want to, saw things they couldn’t unsee. Those who loved Jesus enough to follow Him to the cross, then courageously take up their own cross and continue to follow Him. Daily. No matter how that looked. (Luke 23:35-36,42, 48-49)

Jesus had told them they would need to do this. Take up their cross, whatever it was, and follow Him. Leave behind the things of the world, the people, the habits, the pleasures, the loves, and abandon themselves to God alone. Not once did He say it would be easy. Never had He indicated it wouldn’t be costly. Nor had He promised wealth or popularity. Instead, He’d warned them. Trouble would come. Persecution would arise. People would reject their words, scoff at their standards, mock their beliefs. There would be dangers and death threats. Yet none of this would change the fact that to be His followers, to be true disciples of Jesus Christ, they would each have to stand at the foot of His cross, personally choose to take up their own cross, and follow Him. Every day. (Matthew 10:37-39; Mark 8:34-38; Luke 9:23-25, 57-62; John 16:33)

The message hasn’t changed in the ensuing centuries. If you are going to be a disciple of Jesus Christ, you must first go to the cross. It’s non-negotiable. But it’s not just a visit. It’s a daily decision. Simply being present at the foot of the cross means nothing. It is what you do there that counts. It is the repentance you make. It is the change you embrace. It is the choice you make to daily take up your own cross and be a true disciple of Jesus Christ. It is a costly choice. You may have to lay things aside. Things you love. Friendships. Relationships. Hobbies. Loves. You will have to weigh and measure your rathers versus Jesus’ requirements. It has the potential to be painful. It carries the promise of being worth it. (Matthew 19:21; Colossians 3:1-25; Luke 14:33; Galatians 2:20)

All of us have and will find ourselves at the cross. Multiple times. Every day. Unwilling that any human should die in their sins, God makes certain to lead each of us to the place of repentance, the foot of the cross. It is what you do there that matters. It is what you choose there that alters your eternity. Hesitation to lay down your sins and pick up your cross will harm your soul. Attempting to sort through the options, choose the most appealing and discard the others will place your heart in danger. It is only in full surrender and sweet capitulation to God’s will and plan that you will find soul peace and eternal promise. And it’s all available at the foot of the cross. (Job 11:13-19; James 1:22; 4:7; Matthew 6:33; 7:21; 11:28; 26:39; Proverbs 23:26; Romans 12:1-2)

Every inch of the place was packed. Street. Sidewalk. Yard. House. There was barely room for a lone man to squeeze through the crowd in the street and absolutely no hope of actually entering. Doorways were blocked. Window seats were filled. The carefully swept dirt floor of the house couldn’t be seen for the mass of people filling the room. Perching on every available surface. Squeezing into every empty space. Crammed so tightly between those four walls the air could hardly circulate among them. It was no better outside. The entire town must have taken a day from their duties to be there. Hordes of hopefuls hovered around the doors. Groups gathered outside open windows. The line for entry wrapped well around the block. It was impossible to miss. And they were late arriving.

They hadn’t meant to be. It wasn’t lackadaisical mediocrity that had them gingerly approaching the house after everyone else had arrived. They had intended to be there early. Had appeared at their paralyzed friend’s house hours ago, hoping to implement their mobility plan and make him first in line to see Jesus. They had sorely underestimated their task. The logistics of carrying a man on a mat without dropping him and causing further damage were more complex than first believed. And they had never had to do it before. They visited his home regularly. The doctor made house calls. His wife bore the brunt of his care. He never left home. Didn’t need to until today. Today was their day. His day. The one day they had to get their friend to Jesus for healing. It wasn’t a matter of each one grabbing a corner and making a mad dash for Jesus. They would have been on time if it was. Early, even. Instead, they had to contrive a conveyance. Build a way to safely haul the dead weight of a fully grown man through busy streets and an impenetrable crowd. It took longer than they hoped. 

When they finally had their conveyance built, their friend loaded, and carefully made the walk to where Jesus was preaching, the place was overflowing with people. Some were just curious onlookers. Some were intentional seekers. Some, like them, were only there for a miracle. No one was pushing and shoving. No spontaneous wrestling matches erupted. No one disruptive verbal altercations split the air. Most people seemed content to wait their turn. Most people. The four friends holding the corners of the paralyzed man’s mat weren’t. They hadn’t spent hours of work planning and building and carrying to simply wait around to see if Jesus ended up having time for them. They meant to see Him. Now. But there was no way to get in. The doors were blocked. The windows barricaded. Their friend would never fit down the narrow chimney. But he needed to see Jesus, and they were determined to get him there. 

 Building construction must have been their stock-in-trade. Or building deconstruction. Either one. It didn’t take a lot of brain-cramping to come up with a brilliant plan. A plan allowing them to literally lay their friend at Jesus’ feet. All it required was a door in the ceiling. They could do that. They’d been planning and building and overcoming obstacles all day. What was one little roof? Climbing up to the top of the house, they began to deconstruct the dwelling. Meticulously. One section at a time. Gently removing the roofing tiles, they neatly stacked them to the side, taking up only what was necessary. They needed just enough space to lower one mat holding one man. They weren’t trying to go down there themselves. They weren’t looking for personal accolades. They just needed to get their friend down there. Desperately. They needed to get him to Jesus. 

One wonders how long it took the people below to notice something was going on above. It seems they would surely have heard the footfalls crossing the roof tiles. The falling dust raised by the deconstruction would likely have tickled a sneeze out of more than one nose. Light beaming into the dim interior of the house through the growing hole in the roof would certainly have forced their eyes to readjust. If nothing else, the mat complete with paralyzed man slowly being lowered to rest in front of them would surely have made them lose track of what Jesus was saying. Yet it doesn’t seem to do so. There is no record of people complaining at having to make space for a man on a mat. They simply parted, allowing the four friends above to rest their needy friend at Jesus’ feet for healing. Both body and soul. 

In a turn of events no one expected, Jesus doesn’t immediately heal the man’s obvious physical condition. Not because He lacks compassion. Not because He doesn’t care. Jesus looks at that man and sees his needs. All of them. The acute and then the chronic. Jesus heals his heart first. Forgives his sin. Cares for the eternal that is so much more important than the physical. And then He stops to have a conversation with the intractable teachers of the law. The guys who were there, not for salvation or healing or knowledge, but to find fault and carry tales. Men who had already judged Him a menace and were taking up space attempting to prove it. Men who clearly didn’t have the same type of friends as the man lying on the mat. 

The four expectant faces watching from the sides of the newly formed skylight fell in disappointment. They had been hoping for something more. Something physical. Something that would change their friend’s circumstances. Exchanging a round of irritated glances, they nearly acted on the impulse to jump down and put those interrupting men in a headlock. Couldn’t they see the guy on the floor clearly needing more time with Jesus? Just as they were scrambling to their feet to intervene, Jesus handled the situation for them. Looking at their spiritually whole but physically broken friend, He commanded, “Get up. Take your mat. Go home.” And he did. (Matthew 9:1-8; Mark 2:1-12; Luke 5:17-26)

At the end of accounts like this, it is nearly impossible not to wish for more information. What did those four men peering through the roof do when their friend grabbed his gear and headed for home? Did they speak their gratitude to Jesus through the roof? Did they holler their congratulations to their friend as he walked away? Did they shimmy down the house to shake his hand and check out his newly working legs? Or did they simply smile to themselves and quietly set about reconstructing the roof, resting their hearts in the knowledge their labor had not been in vain? Their friend who, that very morning, had been overwhelmed by his physical condition and allowing his spiritual one to slip, had been rescued by a meeting with Jesus. With the exception of fixing the roof, their work was done.

We should all be so blessed as to keep company with friends like these. Friends who see our needs and, even when we can’t drag ourselves there, carry us to Jesus. Friends that pull us back from the brink of an ill-fated decision with honest words of loving wisdom. Friends that pray and praise, encourage and support us through the darkest times of our lives. Friends who embody Jesus and bring us before Him day and night. Why? Because at some point in each of our lives, we become paralyzed by a sin, a situation, a circumstance beyond our control and we can’t manage to find our way anywhere. Our courage wanes. Our hope fails. Our threadbare faith gives way. We are tempted to spend the rest of our lives on our mat with our faces turned toward the wall. Good friends won’t let us do that. Good friends, friends like these four men recorded in the Gospels, will lift us, carry us, and lay us at the feet of Jesus. Right where we need to be. (Proverbs 27:5-6; I Corinthians 15:33; Proverbs 27:17; I Thessalonians 5:14)

Friends, the company you keep matters. Your circle of friends is immensely important. The people with whom you surround yourself are integral to how you live your life. Ultimately, they impact your eternity. At a time of year when we are encouraged to deeply feel the rage and disbelief at Pilate cowardly washing his hands and eschewing just judgment, at Judas selling a life that wasn’t his to sell, at the crowd’s defections, at the ignorant words of the unrepentant thief, I have to ask, what would be different if they’d kept different company? What if Pilate surrounded himself with men who encouraged him to rule with unwavering justice? What if Judas hadn’t fallen in with the Pharisees? What if the crowd had listened more to the firsthand accounts of James and John and Mary Magdalene? What if the criminal on the cross beside Jesus had kept better company beforehand? What if they’d all had friends that would bring them to Jesus no matter the cost? How would the account read then? (Proverbs 13:20; James 4:4; Matthew 26,27; II Corinthians 6:14) 

It doesn’t. I know. I get it. Jesus had to suffer horrible things at the hands of evil men. He had to die a brutal death on a rough-hewn cross. It was God’s plan. His will. So we could be saved from our sins. So we could be rescued from ourselves. So we could have eternal life. So we could keep company with God the Father. No bloody animal sacrifices for sins. No priest to do our praying for us. No temple veil to separate us. We can keep company with God the Father because Jesus fell out of company with those who refused to believe in Him and gave Himself up to death on the cross. For you. For me. For everyone. May we live there. May we be ever aware that Jesus laid down His life for the people with whom He wanted to keep company. His friends. His people. Us. May it make us better friends. The kind of friends that, when we see our fellow followers struggling, striving, barely surviving, we come alongside encouragement, help, hope and strength. Friends that never give up. Friends that don’t simply suggest one should go see Jesus, but the kind of friends that see each other’s needs, lift one another up, carry us there and lay us at His feet. In His presence. In the company of God. (Luke 23:42-47; Romans 4:25; Hebrews 4:16; John 15:12-15; I Thessalonians 5:11; James 4:8; Matthew 11:28; Romans 5:8,10)

Reading back over the words he’d just written, he had to admit the untrained ear would hear them as arrogant. Pretentious. Grandiose. They weren’t intended as such. Not at all. He simply couldn’t find words to properly express the truth that filled his heart every single day. Jesus loved him. Him! John. For no reason, he could think of. There was nothing special to recommend him. He had no fantastic gifts or amazing talents. No one spoke his name in reverent tones. He wasn’t renowned for his financial acumen. He was just a fisherman. His family wasn’t prominent. His pedigree wasn’t extensive. He wasn’t holding his breath to be tapped as the next synagogue leader. He was just plain, ordinary, nondescript John. The disciple Jesus loved. (Mark 1:19-20)

John lived in that space. Inhabited every inch of it. Steadfastly held in the unfailing love of Jesus, he daily rested in the complete, irrevocable awareness that he was loved by God. Personally. Not because he was amazing. Not because he worked really hard. Not because he was perfect. He wasn’t. He knew that. John was more aware of his imperfections than anyone. But he was also aware that Jesus loved him with a love that could never be tempered by the faults and failures, the flaws and fickleness. It was consistent, relentless love. Steadfast love in a wildly capricious society. (John 13:23: 19:26: 20:2: 21:7,20)

Resting securely in Jesus’ love didn’t erase John’s humanity. He still wanted the same things everyone wants. Food. Shelter. Money. Friends. Sometimes he wanted something more as well. Fame. Notoriety. Prestige. Peter wasn’t the only one pulling shenanigans. Flanked by James, John tried some hijinks as well. Approaching Jesus as a team, James and John requested a peek at the seating chart for Heaven. Who was seated where had become of utmost importance to them. They wanted good seats. The best seats. Prestigious, preferential spots. Places on Jesus’ right and left. Their minds had clearly already pictured the elaborate golden placards reserving their tufted, cushioned chairs. Their names emblazoned there for all eternity. Maybe they would say “James” and “John.” Maybe they would read “Sons of Thunder.” It didn’t really matter so long as they were seated in those specific spots. Them. Only them. No matter that there were other deserving men in their group. James and John arrogantly rocketed themselves to the top of the list and went to Jesus to ensure their request would be granted. We read the account and shake our heads at their arrogant selfishness. Jesus listened and loved them. Yet Jesus loved them still. Because Jesus loves people. All people. No matter what. (Mark 10:35-40)

There is nothing you can do to stop Jesus from loving you. Nothing can separate you from His love. Nothing. Not your sins and shortcomings. Not your doubts and fears. Not your wanderings and wildness. Jesus loves you the exact same way He loved John. There is no preferential treatment. You are the person Jesus loves. Relentlessly. Steadfastly. When you rebuff Him. When you accept Him. Jesus loves you the same way He loved those in every account throughout the Bible. His compassion is endless. He generously pours out His love on all humanity. Then and now. To those who believe. To those who don’t. To those who try to have it both ways, and end up choosing their status and wealth and earthly ambitions over Jesus. People like the young man who came rushing up, asking what he could do to obtain eternal life. 

Reciting the law to him, Jesus awaited his answer. Jesus knew he’d done all those things. He knew what the answer would be. He also knew what the answer to the second part of His directive would be. Jesus knew the young man would choose his possessions and prestige over eternal life. He knew His generous offer would be declined. Yet, knowing all that, knowing His words and love and kindness would all be wasted, in the pause before He made the offer, Jesus looked on that man and loved him. Deeply. Knowing he was already turned toward the exit. Knowing he would deem eternal life less important. Knowing the huge sacrifice the man would choose to make. Feeling the loss. Aching with the rejection. Hating the knowledge of what was to come. Jesus still looked at him and loved him. A sinner never to become a saint. Jesus knew, and loved him still. (Mark 10:17-22)

There’s something overwhelming for me in that. Perhaps because I’ve been there. Made poor choices. Gone the wrong direction. Focused more on the plumbline of man than the measuring stick of God. Having heard so much of His anger and rage, I cowered before Him, desperately wishing He would love me, yet never believing I was good enough that He could. I could never find myself in the same space as John, the comfortable place of knowing I was truly loved by God. Eventually, I picked up my Bible and read it. Allowed it to speak the lessons to me personally. Learned God for myself. Found out that He wasn’t actually waiting around corners gleefully hoping to see a misstep so He could brutally punish me. Understood that He loves me too much to let me stay in my sin, but His corrections are gentle and kind rather than hateful and raging. And I finally found that place. The place John rested. The place of knowing that I am the disciple Jesus loves. So are you. 

You are the person Jesus loves. Yes, you. Jesus loves you. Imperfect. Impudent. Imprudent you. The you that’s hidden beneath all the layers of superficial kindness and caring. The true self you can barely stand to uncover and behold. Yes. That you. Jesus loves that you. He loves all of you. Faithful follower. Finicky fruit inspector. Fastidious poser. John was that guy, yet Jesus loved him. I am often that girl, yet Jesus loves me. You are that person, yet Jesus loves you. Because no matter who you are, where you’ve been, what you’ve done or left undone. You are still that person. You are still the one Jesus loves. And He loves you too much to stand idly by while you die in your sins. (Isaiah 54:10; Lamentations 3:22-24; Jeremiah 31:3; Ezekiel 33:11)

Dear friend, you are the reason He came. His love for you is so strong it compelled Him to leave Heaven for earth, die a brutal death on a rough wooden cross, be buried and resurrected, so you could have the gift of eternal life. You don’t have to accept it. It’s completely up to you. Like the wealthy young man above, you can choose to chase worldly approval and sacrifice your eternity. Jesus will still love you. When you break His heart. When you shortchange yourself. When you sell out for so much less than you are worth. You will still be the one Jesus loves. And, someday, when you change your mind, heed His call, choose to come back, lay your sins, your burdens, your fears at His cross and follow Him, He will welcome you back. Today. Tomorrow. Ten years from now. He will love you still. You are the one Jesus loves. (John 15:13; Romans 5:8; II Peter 3:9; John 3:16; I John 4:10; Luke 15:11-24)

Gingerly, he shifted the line of drying parchments to the side, valiantly attempting to create space for the most recent sheet without smearing a previous one. He didn’t care to do a rewrite. He’d already been at this for hours. Mind meticulously sifting through memories. Quill carefully gliding over crisp parchment. Page after page had been filled. Day had turned to night, then back to day. He’d never have noticed had it not necessitated the lighting of a lamp. His roaring stomach loudly grumbled that he’d skipped a meal. Or two. The last meal he’d eaten was breakfast. Judging by the crow of the rooster and the sun peaking over the hilltops, it was breakfast time again. He’d missed lunch. And dinner. Rubbing his neck and rotating his head, John carefully paused a moment to step back and inspect the parchment he’d just slipped into place. His muscles were tight. His back ached. His shoulders were stiff. The joints of his fingers cried out in refusal when he flexed his hand. And his heart rejoiced. The words of Jesus, His teachings, His miracles, His life, were inscribed on those pages. Words of life for the lives of people.  

No price could be placed on the importance of preserving the words and events inscribed on those pages. They were invaluable. For earthly life. For eternal life. Everyone needed them. Not one person was exempt. John. His family. His friends. His neighbors. People living and those yet to be born. Everyone, everywhere needed those words. Coming generations would be no different than those of his day. Eventually, they would find themselves urgently needing to read, know, and understand these teachings. Because every generation would find themselves in a position to fall away. Away from belief in Jesus Christ. Away from His teachings. Away from His commandments, His principles, His requirements. Every generation would find themselves tempted to rewrite the truth, retell the stories, reinterpret the facts. They would be urged to make the immutable commands of God more palatable. They needed John’s writings, the unadulterated words of Jesus Christ, because they would desperately need to know the path to follow. So they would not fall away. 

Those words were among the last things Jesus said to His disciples. After three years of teaching and talking, living and walking among them, He was going away. They weren’t coming. Couldn’t come. They had to stay behind as lights in the darkened world. But He hadn’t been lax while He was with them. He’d prepared them for this very moment. Every lesson, every sermon, every parable, every moment had been a preparation for the time when He would not physically be among them. He’d told them everything they needed to know. Jesus’ heart for them was that they wouldn’t fall away. From righteousness. From holiness. From God. John’s heart, his reason for long hours uncomfortably bent over a cramped writing desk, was to share the words and life and lessons of Jesus with posterity for the exact same reason. So they wouldn’t fall away. (John 13:31-33, 14:1-12, 15:4-14, 16:1; Matthew 5:14-16)

John had seen the dangers of falling away firsthand. Seated around the table at their final meal with Jesus before His death, the disciples had been surprised to hear that one of their own would betray Him. Someone they knew. Someone they trusted. Someone who had been there when Jesus stilled the sea, gave sight to the blind, healed the lame and multiplied a sack lunch. Someone who was right there to witness Lazarus walking out of the tomb at Jesus’ command. Someone who had heard the same teachings and truths they had all heard, was already in the throes of defection. Someone had fallen away. Offered Jesus’ head to the Pharisees. Sold His life to the chief priests. Would soon be handing Him over to death.  It was unimaginable. It was inconceivable. Yet it happened. (Matthew 26:20-25; John 18:1-5)

He’d been in the garden when Judas, a trusted friend and fellow disciple, approached with a group of soldiers, chief priests, and Pharisees to arrest Jesus. The defection stung. The betrayal cut deeply. The sneer on Judas’ face as he approached and kissed Jesus’ cheek raised bile in the back of John’s throat. Although he may not have known at that moment, John would surely later learn the impetus behind Judas’ actions. The love of money truly is the root of all evil. Judas obviously hadn’t been paying attention to the dialogue between Jesus and the wealthy young man who came seeking eternal life without sacrifice. He must not have heard Jesus’ response that valuing earthly treasures above eternal ones would never result in eternal life. If he heard, he didn’t listen. Judas was in the same trench with the saddened young man who refused to diminish his earthly wealth to gain eternal riches. His love for money superseded his desire for Jesus. For just 30 pieces of silver, he sacrificed Jesus’ life and his own eternity. Money was the thing Judas wouldn’t give up to save his soul. It was the thing that made him fall away.  (Matthew 6:24, 16:26, 26:14-15; I Timothy 6:10; Mark 10:17-23)

Unfortunately, Judas wouldn’t be the only one of them to stumble and fall away. Following at a short distance as they led Jesus into the high priest’s courtyard, Peter found a seat among those gathered around a fire warming themselves. He intended to quietly wait out the hearing. Gain information. Go back and tell the others what he’d learned. Except he didn’t learn what he thought he would. He didn’t learn anything new about Jesus. He learned only something old about himself. The old self-preservation was still alive and well. The old habit of denial and falling in with the crowd was still thriving in his heart. He was still fearful and largely faithless. Just like he’d been when he tried to walk on water. His spirit was willing, but his flesh was weak. He wanted to stand up for Jesus, but his fear of being mocked, abused, or persecuted silenced his voice. Jesus had warned him about this. 

 Hearing Jesus say He was going away but they were staying behind had set off Peter’s impetuousness. He wasn’t having that. He couldn’t think of anywhere Jesus was going that he wouldn’t follow. He loved Jesus more than anything. More than anyone. He would follow Him anywhere. Even death. He’d go there too. Except he wouldn’t. Wouldn’t even be tempted to. When it came down to it and his neck was on the line, Peter would deny even knowing Jesus. Not once. Not twice. Three times. He would adamantly furrow his brow and fervently deny any affiliation. When everything seemed safe and easy, Peter was happy to loudly proclaim his relationship with Jesus. But when things grew dark and threatening, Peter was a coward. Afraid to stand for truth. Afraid to proclaim holiness. Afraid to claim even a passing acquaintance with Jesus. Too afraid of the social status quo, the opinions of influencers, the current tilt of the religious world. Too worried about perception and persecution. Too concerned for his physical safety, Peter forgot about his spiritual security. And he fell away. (Luke 22:54-62; John 13:31-38, 19:15-18,25-27)

Thankfully, Peter didn’t stay there. Fallen away. Denying Christ. No. Within minutes of his third denial, Peter can be found face first in the ground, sobbing his heart out in repentance, gaining spiritual restoration. The same kind of restoration John later wrote about in his first epistle. Encouraging the Christians of that day to walk in the light of God and refrain from sin, John assures them that, if they do sin, the blood of Jesus Christ is still available. To them then. To us now. He paints the overwhelmingly gorgeous picture of Christ as our Advocate, standing before the Great Judge of all the earth, pleading our cause, offering Himself as an alternative to spiritual death. John eloquently reminds us that Jesus was the sacrifice for our sins. He died so we don’t have to. And He left His Word, His commands, His teachings, His stories, so we won’t fall away. (I John 1:5-2:2)

Everything you need to know is in your Bible. Read it. First. Before you read the news. Before you check social media. Before you pick up the latest Christian bestseller or listen to the most recent sermon from your favorite preacher. Read. Your. Bible. Know it. Memorize it. Saturate your soul so deeply in the Word of God that it is your first response in every situation. Changing times. Shifting views. Skewed media. Political agendas. Social influences. Varying opinions and irreligious ideas. No matter what, God’s Word stands. Its life-changing, life-giving, life-saving words last forever. It still applies. All of it. And you need to know it, so you won’t fall away. (Isaiah 40:6-8; Psalm 119:11; Psalm 33:11-14; II Timothy 3:16)